Are You Desperately Trying to Attract Your Ex Back Into Your Life?

Alright, so you are in a passionate upheaval to get your ex back.  It’s okay.  I’ve been there.  I’ll just admit it.  You have done illogical things for the sake of love and are at the point where you don’t even care if you look stupid, lose your pride and dignity all at once.  You want your heart to be full and you want only that person with whom you first felt that exhilarating emotion.  You don’t want to let it go.  It is your hope for true love and nobody can be better for you.  In fact, you will sacrifice your own dreams to support theirs and just being in their life is all you want. As much criticism as you are getting from your friends and family who may know about your love quest, you are going through something that you need to go through, whatever the reason maybe be.  Honestly, you don’t need to know the reason.  Get it out of your system and do the stupid things.  This experience is part of your expansion. Are you going to get your ex back?  That depends on so many things.  Maybe yes and maybe no.  More importantly, do you (your higher self) truly want to re-embark on a relationship journey that is born of such desperation?  I can guarantee you that if your ex partner comes into your life again at this point in time- from where you are vibrating– it is not going to be that joyful bliss that you are truly seeking. Let’s step back and look at this from a broader perspective.  You want to be happy.  Right?  That is why you are after your ex- because you have convinced yourself that doing so is going to make you so, so happy.  And that’s okay.  Then what?  Still feeling down?  Feeling the lack of that very happiness?  It can’t come that way. Give yourself the gift of centering and see if you can accept that the basis of why you want your ex back is to be happy… to love and be loved.  To feel that feeling you are associating with it.  Even if you want to resist what I’m about to say, I’m going to put it out there because on a higher level, you know this already: The person is a physical manifestation of that feeling.  The actual person is not what you are truly seeking.  This hurts, I know.  The great news is that your ex might be it!  I wouldn’t rule it out. However, if you can bring yourself from “I want his/her love, I want his/her love,” to a place of “I want love (hopefully it’s his/hers but with whomever it will be the most awesome experience).”  This alone is a huge step toward the bliss you seek.  Don’t tell yourself you can’t have your ex, and don’t insist that he/she is the only one who you can experience happiness with.  Opening yourself that much takes little practice and moves you far toward the manifestation!

Words Are Energy

It amuses me that words seem like solid things, but are really no more solid than thoughts.  Words are energy.  For thousands of years, we’ve assigned meanings to words.  Yet, a dictionary is seen as an objective source for reference.  Don’t get me wrong here.  When I’m in Italy, I will be using a dictionary to supplement the bit of Italian I can recall from my high school class.  That will help me get around, but if I’m going to have a heart to heart with a Neapolitan local, using a dictionary isn’t going to take me quite as far.

Communication is mostly non-verbal.  This has become common knowledge.  What does this really mean?  Communication is vibrational.  You can pick up on vibes more easily than through the words used.  We’ve all heard this one: “It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.”  Ahem, this is about vibration.  Whoa, so this whole everything is energy thing isn’t some out-there idea to insult organized religion and give us false hope that dreams come true?

Pets understand vibration.  They don’t really understand your words the way you may think they do.  Your pets translate the vibration of the words you use.  They know the vibration of their name.  They get the vibration of the way you are talking to them.  Have you tried to train a dog with absolutely no confidence in your voice?  Did it work?  Of course not!  Your voice is taken as the vibration of it and if that vibration is aligned with uncertainty, then Fido is not going to roll over.

What about parenting?  You know when you should not give in to a tantrum.  You stay firm on your decision of no means no.  Turning a no into a yes will send the message that if a child persists, they will get what they want.  Consider this- speaking with conviction means you are holding the more dominant vibration, which is basically what tells a child that you are firm.  Think about it.  It’s never that you said no.  It’s not really if you said it loudly or quietly, either.  It’s that you said it with the clear and focused vibration of certainty.  When we say no but have that underlying feeling of guilt associated with sometimes saying no, that is when the child can pick up on it and will persist on his own vibration to dominate yours.  Guess which vibration becomes prevalent?  The dominant one.  That’s why you see patterns of children dominating and patterns of parents dominating.  Go to France and see how children are raised.  I think it will make sense pretty quickly.

With words being translated energy, it is comprehensible why the bible can bring up controversy.  This is a compilation of texts that have been translated from so long ago.  First, the person writing the text translated God’s message.  That’s already one translation that was limited to one person’s vocabulary.  Then, over a very long period of time, the same content has been translated by languages.  Some of you may remember my example of the word “hope”.  Hope means something very different to us today than it did in ancient times.

The meaning of any word is in its intention.  Take a person who has never left the Bronx and place him before the Queen of England, and if everything depended on words (even though the languages are not completely different), you’re in for some misunderstandings.  His concept of how to address someone is going to be different than what she is used to.  At that point, a good way to communicate would be for them to pick up on each other’s vibration and understand the intention behind words and accept that they are influenced by very different norms.

When Michael Richards used the “n-word” in a rant at the Laugh Factory, reporters scoured the streets interviewing people and even running internet polls on whether or not the n-word is okay to use or not, particularly in hip hop music and between friends.  As expected, answers were so varied, depending on the way the word was used- the context, the version of the word, and who was using it with whom.  All that buzz and research, when I think everybody understands deep down inside that it is subjective, like everything else.  Sure, they can try to ban a word, but a generation that doesn’t even see it as an insult will not get it, because as far-fetched as it may seem to someone of an older generation, the younger individual may have no negative association with the word and even thinks it’s a term of endearment.  Do you teach the younger person that this is a bad word?  Or do you change the meaning of the word?  Better yet, can you change the meaning of the word for everybody?  The meaning of the word vibrates differently, based on personal associations.

My take is to not make fuss over who used which word.  It’s the intention behind it that matters.  If we are only interested in the good, when someone says something to or about me, I am likely to take it in a positive way.  Assuming that people are picking on us and focusing on energy that does not serve us much is really counter-productive and it is amazing what happens when you assume the best.  In fact, when you are aligned with a higher frequency, whichever words you encounter will be ones that make you feel good, because that is where you are vibrating.  At that point, words don’t even matter so much.  You are biased toward bliss.


The Truth About Visualization And Its Effectiveness (What About Action?)

Photo courtesy of Qtrix @

Photo courtesy of Qtrix @

They say visualize.  Hold the image in your mind.  It will manifest.

The process of visualization has been rapidly getting more attention from the rise in awareness of the Law of Attraction.  Now, there is even more scientific evidence backing it up and making the entire concept less airy-fairy, including the research of a company called Praxis Now.  We all know what it means to visualize.  It’s imagining a picture in your mind, right?  “Image” in your mind= imagining= visualizing.  May not seem like a groundbreaking concept to many.  After all, if we’ve been visualizing all along, how come we haven’t already manifested everything we want?

I’ll ask you this:  How do you feel when you visualize what you want to attract?  When I first became interested in implementing the principles of manifesting and deliberate creation, I quickly took this into consideration.  It didn’t take long to understand what I, myself, had been doing for years that was keeping me away from my dreams.

While daydreaming, there was an underlying feeling of hopelessness.  In fact, it was such a habit that it felt almost comfortable.  I liked something about feeling melancholy and gazing up at the stars, dreaming a dream that was wonderfully far away.  There felt a certain separation between what I had been visualizing (dreaming) and the feeling of actually experiencing that as a reality.  This is what I changed.

The key to visualization is to assume that you are living the dream.  It will seem silly at first.  In fact, it might take a few tries, since the mind pattern around dreaming your dream has always defaulted to seeing and feeling yourself removed from the actual dream.  You can stop and rewind, trying it again.  Your mind will want to go back to the old habit, but you can stop, go back, and gently steer your feelings to the current state of experiencing your visualization.  You might have to do this just once or a few times and that’s okay, because it only takes a few tries for your mind to begin wrapping itself around experiencing the feeling state of what you are visualizing.

It might start off feeling a bit robotic, but this won’t last for long, especially if you truly want your desire.  There will be emotions involved, and soon you will really feel emotions triggered by the feeling of having it.  You will find yourself smiling here and there during it, then smiling pretty foolishly, then maybe more physical signs like getting choked up.  Eventually, the emotions will seem to consume you and your entire body will feel as though it is true.  This is your turning point.  This is when the manifestation of your desire is about to show up.  Hold on to this feeling for as long as you can, and it does not have to be for more than a few minutes.  If you can fall sleep in this state, even better.  Repeat this regularly.  It really doesn’t matter if you skip a day or if you do it once, twice, or three times a day.  The effectiveness only depends on doing it right and capturing the feeling of already experiencing it then repeating it somewhat regularly. This consistency keeps telling your mind, “This is what I want.”

“So, that’s it?  It’s just going to show up?  I don’t have to DO anything?”

Well, you DID something in this exercise.  What you DID was you programmed your subconscious mind to be attracted to that outcome, and this will reflect in your behavior- the choices you make throughout the day.  You will end up making daily choices that lead you one step to the next, all leading up to your physical manifestation that is experienced now by your physical senses.  When you think you’re picking a random place to have lunch, your mind is going to rear you towards where opportunity lies.  You will notice that what before seemed like insignificant choices throughout your day are now influenced by your subconscious mind to lead you toward what you are positively focused on and have established to your mind that you truly want, rather that toward what you feel stuck in having to settle with.

This is the base of understanding the way visualizing works.  I’ve read many times how meditation and visualizing is not enough to get you where you want to be- that you need to take action.  Well of course you do, sillies.  We are taking actions every day.  Only now, they will be inspired actions that will get you to the place you want to be so much more smoothly and easily.  Forced action can bring results, but a lack of clarity and tuning in to what you really want it to be like when you get there, can lead to action that is an uphill struggle to mediocre results.  Get in touch with what you want to feel like when you get where you want to be.  Let your true self understand what your destination is, and it will inspire you to the best way to get there.  You will be more at ease when making choices and the choices will serve you better.

There is one more thing I’d like to address today, and that is the way it will feel when you experience the physical manifestation of your dream.  It’s going to feel natural.  Don’t be surprised when this happens.  In fact, it’s going to feel so natural that you will probably smile instead of scream from surprise.  There’s a good reason for this: you already experienced all this through your exercises.  Your mind is used to this being reality.  It is already familiar with the concept of your dream.  So, when you can see it through your physical eyes, it feels absolutely natural.  You’re going to smile a lot and be amazed at your own power the first few times, but then it will become completely natural, and the amazement will turn to mostly gratitude and appreciation.  You will be a master of conscious manifesting.

Welcome Welcome Welcome!

I am so excited to be sharing information and insight on all the things I love pertaining to self-development and manifesting the good stuff!  

A very short while ago, I didn’t even know what a blog is.  Here I am with my own.  Go figure.  My plan is to have no plan.  While some might advise against this, I am going to post what I feel like posting and when I feel like posting.  At the moment, there exist so much information about mindfulness and co-creating through conscious manifesting that I don’t even know where to begin.  Yet, wordpress has reminded me that it is time for my first post.  I hope this little intro broke the ice, and that the universe inspires me to blog/vlog about the things that you want to hear!  I would love feedback from the community about what areas of manifesting you would like for me to focus on from time to time!  

Now that I can check “first blog post” off my to-do list, on to my own journey of conscious creation.  I will be reporting back with some sort of structured input soon! 

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